Ok ive caved. I cant bear it anymore, i have to tell somebody! Though this doesnt really count as 'somebody' per se and i cant be arsed to punctuate properly, but god. No ones supposed to know this anyway omg. But anyway. I kinda read my moms email. Which sounds pretty bad, it is, but then she never logs out of her email anyway. I didnt Really /intend/ to. I just wanted to check some emails jess sent me, and it happened to be that stuff i email directly from the ipad goes into my moms mail! So i checked it. Then i saw.
It was the photos from my well you could call him uncles engagement thing. My mom never bothered showing me anything! Im not really sure why, like everyones sort of treading carefully around this wedding stuff, not getting too excited about it yet im so excited i was like virtually screaming when i first heard. I dont know why. I just love weddings that have something to do with family and close friends and generally people i know. I really really dislike going to strangers weddings because usually id be bored out of my mind. But this is something else. Ive been wanting him to just go ahead and do it for years! And finally its happened! And the best thing is i can help! With the designs and stuff!!!
Except thats what i thought. In reality im pretty much in the dark about most things, and i feel this odd awkwardness when i ask my mom about it so i generally just refrain. And shes confused about why im so excited. But the question to her is why isnt /she/ excited? Isnt she happy for her cousin, the one who keeps calling her his 'favourite'?! Goodness.
Instead if being involved in anything, ie going to my grandmas and pitching ideas, im stuck at home studying all day. Like literally all. Day. I have only until thursday left but ive missed out on so many of the goings on already. And i feel so desperately left out so thats why i ended up stalking the 2nd email, which was the official wedding to do list. Ugh that was the total /jackpot/. Everything was in there. I was a bit miffed at not Seeing my name in it at all, considering i may be the most excited of them all. Well then. Well i suppose its hardly their fault, im in the middle of the most important exam ever, so fair enough.
Wont stop me from being annoyed though. Thursday, please, PLEASE come faster.
11 months ago